|Once Upon A Time No More by Mimi Yoon|
But I didn't want to admit it to myself. I thought if I could just ignore the facts I could power through it and it would all be okay. I have a hard time admitting when something is wrong, and I think this is fairly common for a lot of people. Most people don't like to admit to being sick, they have the mentality of trying to ignore what's in front of them, just like I did. Hoping that if they ignore it, it will go away.
But is this healthy behavior? It happens in more aspects of our lives than just our health. Growing up adults will tell you that you can be anything when you grow up, but that's a lie. I could never have been a professional athlete, (well, there's still a chance I could be a professional bowler if I drop everything now an start practicing) I doubt I could have ever been an astronaut either. At some point you're probably better off getting hit with a dose of reality and following what makes sense as compared to what you dream about.
How many people have stayed in relationships for too long knowing that something wasn't right? We cling to the idea that things will get better, or that we don't want to face the facts that it's painful to move on but you need to.
I've stayed at jobs longer than I should have too. I wasn't happy, I was being bullied by my boss. It took a lot to push me past a breaking point to leave because of a number of reasons, one was because I was scared to find a new job, but the other was I had a hard time admitting something was wrong for a long time.
I dream of winning the lottery, but that's a dream I gave up a long long time ago because the reality is, it wasn't going to happen.
I also minored in psychology in college because I was interested in people and why they do what they do. I dreamed of having my own practice and really making a difference in peoples lives. But I sat myself down and thought it through, it would have required at least a masters, if not a PHD, plus at least a few years of training/building a practice, then by the time I was in my early/mid thirties I could then perhaps have my own practice. I knew that the longer I'm doing something the more I get bored of it, so did I want to spend all those years getting to some place I might be tired of when I reached it? I choose not to, I choose to go into computers, be done with school, and be paid for my time. Now I'm in my early thirties and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel for early financial independence already. If I went the other route, I would possibly just be starting my career where I wanted to be with debt. I'm glad I gave up that dream.
I also love animals. Working with animals was something I've wanted to do my whole life. But the reality of that dream was that, I probably would have a hard time being able to afford living in the bay area with that career path. I still haven't given up completely on that dream, but it's not my main goal in life. I think once I reach financial independence I may try to get into working with animals then, when income doesn't really matter as much. But I also think it could be a hard field to be in. If I worked at a shelter I could become really attached to them just to see them get adopted and go. Or if I worked at a vet's office I would see a lot of animals in pain or animals that might need to get put down, and I don't want to see that.
But this mindset of knowing when to give up on something is applicable to so much more than life choices. This applies to investing too, sometimes you invest in a company like Soda Stream because you think the idea of people making their own healthier soda at home is a good idea. Maybe you see your friends buying them, you see some commercials, but then the company's quarterly results come out and the stock gets hammered. Sometimes you have to just let an investment go. Knowing when to give up on an investment is also very important. Some people double down when a stock takes a beating, they average down in their investment by purchasing more stock at the new lower price, thinking that they can make up the difference.
I personally have never averaged down on an investment. I like to see strength in my investments not weakness, but I do see how it can be tempting. Though I have initiated a new position on bad results before, just never added to one.
I'm not saying you should always take the safe route and give up so easily on your dreams, but weigh how important your dreams are to you and the reality of making them happen. If you want it bad enough then keep at it, don't give up. But when it comes to investing, don't dream that it will turn around, listen to the market, have an exit strategy.
Knowing when to admit something is wrong is a hard lesson to learn, and learning it in one facet of your life may help you control it in others. So here I am, at home on one of the best weather weekends in San Francisco in a while, sick.